had a really lovely day with mommy today...went to IMM in the morning...bought lotsa stuffs for the UK...and i managed to buy my fav cotton wool...haha...yes i am very fussy with what i use on my face...then daddy drove us to tanglin mall and dropped us there...mommy tailor-made herself a nice blouse...nice colour...turquoise...then went to that cd shop and bought a cd with my current fav chinese songs...been waiting for so long for someone to burn it for me...sigh! anyway, i saw something which i really like...a white gold rolex watch with diamond face...dreams that it will be my 21th birthday present from the parents...haha...the watch just looks so classic and elegant...i wanna have a collection of dessert wines too...they taste soooo good...oh, bought some lovely polo tees too...i adore shopping...more shopping tomorrow...still got a long list of things to buy before i head back for the uk next week...gonna miss all my friends!

something really lame happened today...i was shopping for stuff when i bumped into this guy...he came up to me and said, "miss, your shirt very nice" gosh! i think he must be blind...just a polo tee...what so special right!!!! then later he went on trailing me...i wanted to tell him to f*** off...after a while he then came and ask me, "miss, can i ask you out for a meal?"...guess what i told him..."sure, if you wouldn't mind me bringing my boyfriend along"...haha...he got really pissed off...haha...

time flies...my summer hols are almost over...and it will be the start of a new school year for me...a brand new school...new friends...a totally new environment...i am rather excited to go to glasgow...it's a really lovely place...i love the old english cobbled streets...lovely cafes...old victorian buildings...a truly romantic place...oh, not to mention scotland is one of the coldest place in UK...extremely cold winters...gosh! i think i need more winter clothes...

had dinner at "my humble house"...food was good...and the ambience was great...i love fine dining...fine wines and food is something which i truly adore...i really have expensive taste... takes pleasure in the fine things in life...that's me! i am still confused with which uni i should be going to...glasgow or trinity...i loves the environment in trinity...everything is within reach...but glasgow has a very reputable med school...been chatting with daddy on the unis over dinner...i think i have fixed my mind on going to glasgow...coz the lecturers there are really friendly...plus they chose me...i mean if they don't want me they won't have given me a place after the interview right? at least the dean of the dental school have this faith in me...that i can do it...i will make their school proud...

Hugo n Me! So sweet right?

daddy told me Aunty lisa thinks highly of me...she thinks i will have a very bright future...such compliments do work on me...bleah! and daddy have been calling me "doctor"...i don't really like that name though...honestly, i fear to go to dental school...coz everyone there is so damn smart...what am i compared to them? daddy says i have to believe in myself...i have gotta think of ways now to improve on my study skills...plus i have gotta read more...it's not gonna be easy...but i'm up to the challenge...alright enough of my nonsense...bye...

well something is really making me ponder...you once told me you loved me...but why can't i see it...i have been waiting for you to prove yourself...it's taking years...and i am getting tired...sometimes i just find your words don't carry any weight...maybe i shouldn't think too much...i could see some things going on at the back of me...it's just pissing me off...things are getting complicated...i don't think i am being too sensitive here...coz i'm sure i am not...just leave me alone...please...i can't fall any deeper...or i will be hurt once again...

results were out yesterday...wasn't that pleased with it though...i thought my results were really lousy...was whining the whole of yesterday...throwing my tantrums too...gosh! i really lost my cool...and daddy was saying to me that i have used the wrong study techniques...despite all these...glasgow dental school still wants me...so i am lucky...though i think i could have done better...sigh! i have decided to move on and excel in dental school...coz there is still a long way to go...

George n Me! i miss u loads...thanks for always being there for me when i am down...

My lovely class!

Beautiful scenery around my school...

Mrs Chin n Me! She is truly a wonderful housemother...i love her!

My Pics

i love my mom so much...it is more than words that i can expressed my thanks to her...without her i won't be where i am today...i owe her so much...i wanna be an excellent doctor in future...i promised...so that she can be very proud of me...seeing her smile makes me feel so happy inside...i know there are times that i really let her down...and making her upset over me...i will change mom...to be that good girl you long for...

during this past few days after my op...i realised how much mummy loves me...the way she cared for me...the way she washed my wound...touched me so much so much...i love her...it is her who makes this family of mine so beautiful...

Qualities that i look for in a guy

1. faithful (this is the first and foremost important quality)
2. intellectual
3. romantic
4. mature
5. patience knows no bounds
6. extremely affectionate
7. good character
8. pleasant looking
9. being able to give me a sense of security (this is very important too)
10. a family man (woot!)

The list shall just go on...muahahaha!

i was crying uncontrollably just now when i was at east coast park...crying by the beach alone...why is there no one who could really understands me...sometimes i just feel like a fool...is there such thing as true friends will be there to share your ups and downs together...so why i don't see anyone...i hate my mom...she always just says negative things to me...makes me feel so low and down...my eyes are swollen now...how can i go for my trip tomorrow...i really dont know...

My Pics

My Pics

My Pics

i don't know what is going on in me recently...i just keep on falling into depression...been throwing my tantrums and pushing people away from me...i don't know why...sometimes i wished i wasn't born me...coz i don't feel a single bit of happiness at all...i just seemed to find myself plagued with problems...there are times that i wanna share it with someone...coz it just feels so pain to bottle up all these unhappiness...but i never seemed to find the courage to share...

went to help sze man with some work today at her company near amoy street...well, i love the interior design of the office...makes me feel really comfortable working there...i would like my work place in future to be as comfy as this...moreover, there were like free supply of can drinks...guess what...i drank all of the soya bean milk found in the fridge...haha...it was so delicious...and i can't resist them...plus i ate most of the sweets that sze man brought from home...i think i am sounding like a pig man! tried to make up for it by skipping dinner...i am so scare to grow fat again...had a really fun time working...plus we had a great bitching time together...oh i have been eyeing on this new casio digi cam lately...hoping to get mummy down with me to buy it tomorrow...alright enough of my nonsense...i'm feeling really tired...night...

well...something is just making me ponder...i seem to be seeing some light...i am just wondering are you just as simple as i always thot...or you are more complexed then i can ever imagine...i really don't know...but things are just appearing in my eyes...and bits and pieces are coming into place...i don't understand why do you really get yourself into all those shit...tell me...i can see you digging your own grave...and my heart aches to foresee what is going to happen to you...but i know i have to act as if i dont know anything at all...all your lies...i don't know how long can i tolerate it...i hope that my patiences for you will last...but i can't allow myself to fall any deeper again...

met up with lynn today at coffee bean in wheel lock place...it was really great catching up with her...we had so many things to talk about...well, i love her to bits...i missed those great times we used to spend together after school during our KC days...now everyone is grown up...i think we are going to meet up more to catch up on those bitching times we missed...she was one of my bestest friend in KC...but we lost contact for a period of time due to some childish matters...wow i really admire her relationship with her bf...they are such a loving couple...so sweet...wished i could find a guy like hers too...or maybe i will just be left on the shelf...*winks*...but i am still happy being alone coz of my fears...i don't wished to fall into another trap...well...sometimes i just ponder upon those mistakes of mine...and i won't deny that i can be quite unreasonable in times...but yeah that's me! i do wanna improve myself...but that takes time...i wanna be someone who is truly well-loved and respectable by everyone...i hate being always critised by my parents that my character is so lousy...i will prove them wrong soon...bleah!