I know one day you will be touched by everything that i have done...it's just in HIS time...

Tossing and turning...why can't things ever be stable...why are there ups and downs all the time...We have come so far and only to realise that we are falling back down again...

The boyfriend is not happy again...sigh...and i really don't know why...he just switched off his phone the whole night and later texted me to say "Goodnight, Jean." I guess he must be PMSing...for no reason he just gets angry with me...plus i haven't done anything wrong today...I just went for Johnathan's nineteenth birthday in the evening and was back home sleeping after that...

I am finally done with my exams and i pray that by God's Grace i will make it through this time round...Listening to some classical piano music right now...it's so soothing and it's bringing me back memories...loads of memories...all of my beautiful past which i know it will continue when i get back home...yes, i miss life back in Singapore...all my lovely friends...and i came across someone's blog...and i saw those beautiful smiles and pictures of people back home...i miss it so much...i finally realised how beautiful it is to be back in Singapore...the beach, sunset, nice music, great food, beautiful women and gorgeous men, nice romantic places, wine and dine, family...seriously, i can't wait to graduate and get back home to reunite with all my loved ones again...there's no place better than home...my sunny island, Singapore!

Okay Paper 1 is finally over...and i seriously have no clue whether i will be passing it anot coz there were two huge questions on public health which i didnt study and i basically made my answers up...i just have to trust in God that through his abundant grace i will PASS! I have got to believe so that i can receive it...Anyway, quarrelled with the boyfriend again this afternoon...received a text from him saying "Bloody Rude Girl"...Oh my goodness...when i saw the text i was like what happened...i just finished my lunch and i was feeling down from my paper...and why out of the blue you texted me to scold me...PLUS...there wasn't any sorry from him...i always got scolded for being rude and not saying sorry but this time round it seems like he is the one...sigh...

I am feeling tearful once more...just the night before my exams...i wish i hadnt seen you tonight...so i wont have to bear the speed of your fast car that send shivers to me...i thought i was gonna die in a car crash...you scared me once more...the words exchanged tonight may not be what you wanna hear...but that's the truth...i have so many things to justify what i said...but it's best keeping quiet i guess...you promised prayers but becoz of all your other plans...and becoz it's late...everything just went down the drain...

I have so much anger with the boyfriend...things wouldnt have been this way if i didnt get to know you...so much regrets...lesson learnt...never give up anything for a man...it's not worth it...

Just thinkin' about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow
Till there's none...

I am sorry to have hurt the people around me...i saw the tears in all of your eyes...it hurts like mad...my heart is bleeding...sometimes i wish that i wasnt on this earth so that i wont have caused so much hurt to you guys...i am so useless...always behaving like a spolit princess...i think i may be leaving Glasgow for good to recover from everything...much love, Jean

Psalm 34:18
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

Dear Lord, I just pray that this night you will surround me with your love and warmth, for i need it so much from you right now. For you alone will love me so much besides my Earthly Parents. Wipe away every tear from my eyes. You have my heart Father. You are my strength. God of grace and power. Carry me through this tough time. Father, i ask that you will bless me with a man who will love me like you. Your unfailing love. This i make in your most precious name. Amen.

Colossian 3:17
"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."

Fears has caused me to run away from you...

Psalm 31:1-5
"In you, O Lord, I have taken refuge;
let me never be out to shame;
deliever me in your righteousness.
Turn your ear to me,
come quickly to my rescue;
be my rock of refuge,
a strong fortress to save me.
Since you are my rock and my fortress,
for the sake of your name lead and guide me.
Free me from the trap that is set for me,
for you are my refuge.
Into your hands I commit my spirit;
redeem me, O Lord, the God of truth."

MICHY-BOO-BOO is slightly pissed but happy.

HELLO EVERYONE!

THIS IS HAPPY MICHY SAYING HELLO TO EVERYONE FROM GLASGOW :)

LOVE,
THE RANDOM & IRONIC BLUE GHOST

Hebrews 13:15
"With Jesus' help we will continually offer our sacrifice of praise to God by telling others of the glory of his name."

The faithful have learned that in the long run, life works best when they reach out in an adoring venture of faith to praise God with daring defiance even though reason rises up and argues to the contrary.

Sometimes i feel like a fool to you, but i will just continue perservering...

Lord, I want to find my happiness in you Coz you will never disappoint. This i make in Your most holy Name. Amen.

I am feeling something different around me tonight but i know i have got to continue perservering and not let these things affect me...i will look at the positive side of things that God has blessed me with someone whom is still there giving me voices of encouragement...though we may seem far apart but knowing that you are still listening to my tears and telling me how much God has worked in me has strengthened me so much...I thank you for still being there for me despite how much i have hurt you in the past...sometimes when i hear your voice over the phone...my heart cries out so much...you were my miracle man and i still can remember those things you have done for me..without you i wouldnt be where i am now...much love, Jean

Romans 5:3-5
"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perserverance; perserverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."

I am feeling so upset...so much tears...but there is no one that i could trust or i could turn to...not even my boyfriend...who has never understood me before...maybe becoz we are just leading a very different life...Teddy, i miss you so much...sigh...i want my past back...

With greater expectations comes more disappointments...i miss my past...my friends...my loved ones...