sigh...i dont exactly know what to say right now...why can't this jealousy thing stops? the more you try to confuse me...the more i dont wanna love at all...coz you just make me fear the consequences of love...maybe people think that it is good to have a flock of guys going after you...but honestly i am not at all happy...in fact i feel so lost and so insecure...there are days where i feel so down...just wished that i could share my burdens and problems with someone...but after what happened lately...i have closed up once more...i do really just wanna a simple love life...someone who i can spend the rest of my life with...someone who can really love me....someone who can give me the tender loving care that i need...someone who i can laugh with..someone who can really accept the way i am...so when will i ever know who is the right one for me...i just hope for someone to love me sincerely and purely...and not out of any evil intentions...i have kind of lost hope in these things...what i can do now is to just pray and seek god...and for now i shall drown myself in my books...just wanna run away from the realities of the real world...